I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
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