It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Randomize
