awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
