I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Randomize
