the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
