Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
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