Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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