So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
Randomize
