Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
