porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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