We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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