I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
