I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
i think my cat just said my name.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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