im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize