do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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