Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
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