you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
they're like a gay fantastic four
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
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