Do you still have your period?
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Randomize
