I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
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