i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
he high fived his dick after we had sex
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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