Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
