He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
