Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
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