Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
