Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Randomize
