To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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