So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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