I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Randomize
