Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
