What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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