I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize
