we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
