real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Randomize
