oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
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