if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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