I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
Randomize
