he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
