Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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