is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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