Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
lets start a swedish sibling band together
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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