belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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