at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Randomize
