just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
