..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
