My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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