At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
