it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
Randomize