me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Randomize
