I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Randomize
