I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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